After failing to get his wife pregnant, a guy (Schneider) recruits his pals to steal the deposit he left at a sperm bank years ago.
Release Year: 2012
Rating: 3.8/10 (232 voted)
Critic's Score: 30/100
Stars: Paul Schneider, Olivia Munn, Kevin Heffernan
Storyline After failing to get his wife pregnant, a guy (Schneider) recruits his pals to steal the deposit he left at a sperm bank years ago.
Writers: Peter Gaulke, Gerry Swallow
Cast: Olivia Munn
She's fired up. He's firing blanks.
Release Date: 3 August 2012
Filming Locations: Santa Clarita, California, USA
Come in laughing, come out wincing
One must approach a Broken Lizard film with the idea that the actors
obviously have a lot of fun making these fun, energetic romps.
Sometimes more than audiences like watching them. Broken Lizard hit a
home run with me when I saw Club Dread, an inspired parody of slasher
films with entertaining characters, and I found Super Troopers to be
"fun, lively, and good-natured." These characteristics are totally
absent in their latest flick, The Babymakers a dirty-minded,
prepubescent comedy with repetitive jokes about semen, sperm banks,
genitalia, masturbation, sex, you get the idea.
The Apatow-idea of "mixing heart with raunch" doesn't work here,
because any attempt at humanity and sentiment is disregarded so things
like sex puns and lame gags can take their turn on film. The leads are
the laidback Paul Schneider and G4's gorgeous Olivia Munn, who are
sadly not given much to do because the screenplay is so close-minded to
nonsense. The two play Tommy and Audrey, a suburban couple who, after
three years of marriage, are eager to start a family. After nine months
of failed attempts, the two begin to question if one of them has a
problem, whether it be Tommy with his sperm count or Audrey with her
ovaries. Wow, took you nine months to realize that constant sex and no
baby wasn't a good sign? I'd get nervous after attempt three.
They both get tested, and it is revealed that Tommy has a very low
sperm count. One thing Audrey doesn't realize is that, in order to pay
for an engagement ring, Tommy frequented a sperm bank twenty times for
roughly eighty-five dollars in cold, hard cash each visit to pay for
it. When she finds out, she's strangely disgusted and Tommy devises a
plan with his pals (Kevin Heffernan and Nat Faxon) to try and stage a
break in to the sperm bank warehouse to get the samples back. And she's
completely cool with that. As an exercise, ask your spouse whether
they'd be more aggravated at you for donating to a sperm bank or
But first, Tommy learns that one of his samples is out on the market,
and it has been purchased by a local gay couple. When Tommy goes to
visit them it sets up a cruel and wholly unnecessary ten minutes
involving some of the most awkwardly exchanged dialog this year. It's
scenes like this that simply don't belong in a comedy, but The
Babymakers is chock-full of scenes like that.
In order to try and pull off the heist in a coherent manner, they hire
the walking stereotype, Ron-Jon (Jay Chandrasekhar, who also directs),
who was rumored to be a part of the Indian mob. You can imagine how
many jokes just this past sentence can set up and, let's just say, the
film doesn't miss its chance to try and say all of them.
The real tragedy behind this picture is that in the mix of creating
juvenile setups, crass gags, and scenes that stretch far beyond their
reason lengths (take for example Kevin Heffernan's character, who
during the sperm bank heist spills dozens of test tubes containing
semen and spends minutes slipping and sliding around on the floor), the
script successfully undermines both Munn and Schneider's chance at
erecting believable, substantial chemistry, as well as both their
acting talents. Schneider worked in successful independent flicks, and
Munn has consistently proved herself to speak to the geek culture, much
like other filmmakers such as Joss Whedon and Kevin Smith. They deserve
better than this trite.
Jay Chandrasekhar is a reliable actor, but this is second time he has
chosen to direct a film, involving the Broken Lizard team in lackluster
material, with the first being The Dukes of Hazzard film adaptation.
What this film needed in order to work was, one, a reality check. These
events are highly implausible, yet are taken in the manner of sincerity
and reality. Two, it needed a script more observant and intelligent. It
could still be a raunchy comedy and fulfill this proposition, so my
question is, why didn't it? And three, it needed to give both its leads
some much deserved screen time instead of subjecting them to
ridiculously contrived arguments about donating sperm to a sperm bank
multiple times, uncomfortable discussions with the neighbors about
possible donations, not to mention other sequences involving homosexual
humor and a montage of blows to the scrotal region. I came to laugh,
but I did far more wincing - one thing that is almost immediately fatal
Starring: Paul Schneider, Olivia Munn, Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin
Heffernan, and Nat Faxon. Directed by: Jay Chandrasekhar.